greggandcyndi

on going

the process of getting a new ministry position is on going.  i'm still in the process with mediapolis, but wanting to just check out our area, i found another church, so now i am in the process with them.  please pray for us as we will probably have different interview over the next couple of weeks.

five questions

a friend of mine did this on his site, you can check out his original post here.  he provided me with these questions, i'll answer them, you'll read them, you'll read the rules and we'll see where this goes.

1) If you could be any character in any movie, who would you be and
how would your being in the movie change the plot?

i believe that i would be Bastian Bux in one of the greatest movies of all time, "the neverending story".  i'm not sure that plot would change, as much as, i wouldn't have been so slow to give the Childlike Empress her new name.  if you have never seen this movie, you have to see it, i own it, and it is awesome.  i admit, the book is better, but, what movie is better than the book?

2) What is the one thing that frustrates you the most in life right now?

i can only choose one?  well there's how slow things seem to move sometimes, there's moving from one place to the other while still feeling like i'm not home yet, there's not understanding what the last year of my life has been about, but i suppose that the highest on my list would be how quickly i turn from the trust i am to have for God.  i just want to be consistant with Him, yet i contuniually try and fall back on my own understanding and control.

3) If you could eat anything at any place in the world, be
with anyone you would like to be with, where would you be, who would
you be with, and what are you eating?

i was in the wisconsin dells over my 21st birthday and had the best steak i have ever had in my life.  it was the first black angus steak i had ever eaten, so that steak would definately be the main course, i think i would be back in the honeymoon suite cyndi and i shared in seattle, and i would be, of course, with cyndi.

4) As you seek out youth ministry again, what will be the first three
things that you will try to do once you get hired on staff somewhere?

the first thing i will try to do, is to do nothing.  i am such an action oriented person, i am prone to changing things and wanting things to change quickly and regularly, but in going to a new place, i know i need to be patient

i want to spend a great deal of time getting to know the youth volunteer staff that i will be working with.  they have been there, and been working with those students and i should be able to learn a lot from them.  i am looking forward to finding new relationships.  i would really like to form some lifelong friendships with these volunteers in this next move.

i want to do my best to meet and get to know as many students and their families as possible.  i would really like to stay out of program mode and really just be relational.

5) What traits did your father (or paternal role model) have that you
would like to see in yourself as a father, and what traits would you
rather die than see in yourself?

providing.  my dad has always been a great provider.  i know that the money in the family wasn't always used the best, for one reason or the other, but there was always a roof over my head, and food, lots of food, in my stomach.  i never went barefoot unless i wanted to, and even if i was wearing a pair of jeans i didn't like, i was at least wearing something.  my dad has always done a great job of providing for me, especially since i have been older, i have been able to see that he is a great provider.  last month my car needed working and and he gets car parts for cheep because of where he works, when i tried to pay him for them, he wouldn't tell me how much it was and wouldn't let me pay him.

i think the trait that i would like not to have, which i do see in myself sometimes is that of 'escaper'.  i think sometimes when things are really stressful or hard, i can find a way of escaping for an hour or two.  that isn't neccesarily always bad, but i think it is a dangerous trait that i need to watch out for.

here are the rules of engagement

1. If you want to participate, leave a comment below saying "interview me."
2. I will respond by asking you five questions - each person's will be different.
3. You will update your journal/blog with the answers to the questions.
4. You will include this explanation and an offer to interview others in the same post.
5. When others comment asking to be interviewed, you will ask them five questions.
6. I will answer reasonable follow up questions if you leave a comment.

healing process

as i have been praying an thinking on youth ministry, it has become more and more apparent that i buried my feelings about what happened during my first youth ministry position.  i am asking for your prayers as i do my best to let these memories be healed, so that i can move on in the best way possible, healed and whole.

i think i am going to email the pastor of the church i worked at to share with him how i feel and felt in order to gain some closure. 

sense of smell

why is God so good?  think about who we are.  think of what he has done.  it is clear that we, in no way, deserve the love of the infinite and all knowing God that has been forever and always will be. 

the world tells us to think so highly of ourselves, that we have rights and merit that is somehow worthy of acknowledgement.  some people live their entire lives to be acknowledged.  i have been that person.  but now i see the more i think of myself, not in terms of time or obsession, but in stature, the less i think of God, once again, not the amount of time, but worth.  have you ever heard the saying, "so-and-so thinks their ____ doesn't stink"?  i'm like that sometimes.  when i am that way, i am proving how little i think of God, how low i have put him and how far from the center i have pushed him.

when my nose has lost its sensitivity to be able to smell my own condition, it means that i have lost perspective.  how's your nose working lately?  why do i forget where i came from so easily?  it's like when you put on way too much cologne and after a while your nose is so completely desensitized that you can't tell how horrific you smell, and you walk into a room thinking you're the bomb, but everyone stays at least six feet from you at all times to protect their brain cells from dying.  this is the condition of heart i never want to be in, but somehow find on a somewhat annual basis.

vick's vapor breath-strips for the heart?  is that what we need?  is that what i need?  you see, remaining in a constant and consistent state of sensitivity and tenderness is admittedly an incredibly difficult feat to fulfill, but...when i think of how great that glory of God feels, it makes me want to admit how bad i smell, and plead with him to clean me up.

father in heaven, purify my heart and annoint my head with your sweet presence.  i ask for your forgiveness for when i think more of myself than i should.  you are so much higher than i, yet i put myself above you so often it hurts to think about it, but i think about it so that i will not try and hide any part of my failure from you.  thank you for your forgiveness and your grace.  may i be a sweet smelling aroma to you, and may i be molded to be more like your son Jesus Christ.  your son, your servant.